Sean's email has been in my Yahoo inbox since August 23rd. Every time I open my email on my phone, I see his email. I thought I could add this to my blog. It was nice to read this thoughts and how he feels about having a family. I had Sean write this back in August because I was trying to apply for a grant from a foundation that gives funds to a Infertility Center for us to be able to conceive using IVF. Unfortunately, we missed the deadline (I found out about it too late to get all the information together).
"I had always wanted a child to raise as my own, but until recently, I have never tried. My wife, Faith, and I decided to stop with birth control and see what happens, in the summer of 2010. In October of 2010, while I was TDY for pre-deployment training, I received a text message from Faith with a picture attachment. The picture was of a pregnancy test, and it was positive. I was so happy, but sad at the same time because I wouldn't see her to celebrate for another 3 days. I was scheduled to deploy for 6 months, leaving in just 40 or so days from that point. Those next few weeks were filled with excitement, planning and anticipation. The doctor told us we were about 12 weeks along, but then we found out it was only 6 weeks along... With twins! Wow, what a change in feelings and planning. Faith and I were overwhelmed with happiness and couldn't wait to have our babies. I deployed at the beginning of December, 2010. I got the bad news from Faith during my travel to the deployment location, she miscarried the day I left. I felt guilty, sad and mad. Guilty, because if I didn't leave, would it have happened? Sad because we Lost what we had wanted so bad. Mad because my job had me so far away, I couldn't be there to comfort Faith.
When I returned from deployment, we took some time re-acquainting, and then it was back to trying to get pregnant. After being pregnant once, planning and anticipating, and being so happy, we both knew we had to get there again, and soon! After 7 months of trying and having no luck, we decided to pursue help from a fertility specialist. We met with a specialist and got all the tests done, and we were told everything was working the way it should, so we started with the first step. The first step was for Faith to start taking Clomid in preparation for our first IUI. We both started eating better and I was diligent at remaining hydrated and refrained from alcohol, decreased my intensity of exercise and wore "more appropriate" underwear. It was an exciting adventure and we were both happy to be on it. 4 months went by, and 3 IUIs, emotional swings and what we believe another miscarriage, and still, we were not pregnant. The price of the procedures coupled with the emotion swings from the pills made us decide not to continue. And the next step to take was IVF, which we couldn't afford.
So Faith and I decided to go back to the "natural" way and just let time sort us out. It has been another 3 months of no pregnancy. Faith and I want a child of our own and look forward to that day with joy and excited anticipation.
Thank you for listening."
Sean Stephenson
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